Yesterday, we brought Robin to Advanced Studies and Leadership camp at the Massachusetts Maritime Academy. It’s a terrific program, serving about 200 7th and 8th graders from public school districts on Cape Cod. For three weeks (coming home on weekends), they’ll do a mix of STEM-related classes and activities, a humanities course, team games, music-making, and all kinds of other stuff.
Robin and her friends call it “nerd camp.” They couldn’t be happier or more excited. They’re living in dorms, and assigned roommates not from their own town so that everyone gets to know as many new kids as possible. It’s right on the Cape Cod Canal. A dorm is a dorm, but the view from this one is pretty cool.
I am so proud of her and thrilled for her to have this opportunity. It’ll be the first time she’s been away from home longer than overnight, so a major step for our family, and particularly for her sister. The girls have been fighting lately, which is unusual for them.
Robin can be bossy (first child…), and her emotions can get out of proportion when people don’t behave as she wants them to. Josie can just shut down and refuse to engage. They each get how they get, and know when to give each other a wide berth. But lately, Robin’s been picking fights, and overreacting to things even by 12 year-old girl standards. And the mood swings… omg. Yesterday she was screaming and crying about how she hated everything and nobody understands or listens to her. Ten minutes later she made us all oatmeal cookies. Today, she picked the same fight with Josie as yesterday — ending in the same screaming and crying and self-indulgent wallowing outrage as yesterday, saying how she’s DONE. DONE! with having a sister. Then she asked if they could watch a TV show together.
I think (warning: amateur psychology ahead) that a lot of their fighting has to do with getting ready to be apart and miss each other. It’s easier to be OK with a separation if they’re not feeling so happy together, sure. But more than that, both girls are at developmental stages where each is beginning to see and define herself in the world apart from her family, and apart from her sister in particular: I am like this. You are like that. I am not like that. It is OK for me to be away from that. In fact, I don’t even like that very much, so there.
All normal, I think, but it’s exhausting.
As much as we’re going to miss Robin and the house will feel incomplete while she’s not home, we could all use a break from the whole tween psycho routine. I have whiplash from following the mood swings too closely. I can’t wait to hear how nerd camp is going when she comes home for the weekend, by which time I hope to be out of my neck brace.